You’re Not Traumatized — You’re Avoiding the Mirror
The Cost of Avoiding Accountability in a Comfort-Obsessed Culture
The Truth About Truth Tellers (And Why People Hate Them)
People hate truth tellers because the truth makes them uncomfortable.
It exposes their lies, their coping stories, and the fantasy they’ve built to avoid responsibility. And once you see the lie, you can’t unsee it.
That moment of acknowledgement?
That’s where the mirror shows up.
And the mirror demands change.
Who the hell wants to do that?
It’s far more comfortable to stay tucked inside your delusion, blaming everyone else for why your life feels heavy, stagnant, or unfulfilled. Growth is inconvenient. Accountability is uncomfortable. And comfort has become the highest god of our time.
So here’s the truth bomb I’m dropping today:
Being inconvenienced or uncomfortable is not trauma.
What Trauma Actually Is (Not What TikTok Says It Is)
Trauma is not a feeling.
Trauma is not discomfort.
Trauma is not someone disagreeing with you.
Trauma is a psychological and physiological response to an event or environment that overwhelms the nervous system to the point that the brain literally rewires itself for survival.
This isn’t opinion — it’s neuroscience.
Research from institutions like the National Institute of Mental Health, Harvard Medical School, and The American Psychological Association shows that trauma can alter:
The amygdala (fear response becomes overactive)
The hippocampus (memory processing is impaired)
The prefrontal cortex (decision-making and emotional regulation decline)
In other words, trauma changes how your brain processes threat, safety, memory, and emotion — often long after the event is over. This is why trauma responses are automatic, not chosen.
Examples of actual trauma include:
Chronic neglect
Verbal, physical, sexual, or financial abuse
Rape or sexual assault
Domestic violence
Living in a consistently unsafe environment
Life-threatening illness or injury
Severe accidents or natural disasters
Witnessing violence or death
Prolonged childhood instability without safe attachment
That’s trauma.
What Is Not Trauma (Brace Yourself)
Let’s clear the air, because words matter.
What is NOT trauma:
Someone saying something you don’t agree with
Being told “no”
Having your feelings hurt
Being uncomfortable in a conversation
Being expected to take responsibility
Your parents working their asses off to keep food on the table without the luxury of therapy, organic groceries, and nervous-system coaches
Being bored
Being disciplined
Having structure
Being expected to function in society
Discomfort is part of being human.
Challenge is how resilience is built.
Hard does not equal harmful.
The Childhood Trauma Trend (And Where It Went Sideways)
Here’s where things get messy.
Social media — and yes, some therapists — have turned normal human struggle into pathology. Suddenly, everyone has “childhood trauma” because their parents didn’t speak in affirmations or validate every emotion in real time.
Let’s inject some historical reality here.
Gen X and Boomers did not have access to mental health care like we do in 2025.
Therapy wasn’t normalized in the 70s, 80s, or even the 90s. Mental health struggles were buried, not discussed. Many of them were raised by the Silent Generation — people shaped by war, poverty, and survival — where emotions were private and responsibility was non-negotiable.
You didn’t sit around analyzing your feelings all day.
You put on your boots and handled your shit.
And did that cause issues?
Absolutely.
But here’s what it didn’t do:
It didn’t convince an entire generation that every uncomfortable experience permanently damaged them.
Somewhere along the line, resilience stopped being taught and fragility was rewarded. Millennials and younger generations were handed language without wisdom and validation without accountability. Feelings became facts. Identity became injury. And struggle became something to be avoided at all costs.
That’s not healing.
That’s regression.
Responsibility Is the Missing Ingredient
Here’s the part people really don’t want to hear:
You are not responsible for what happened to you — but you are responsible for what you do with it.
Your trauma does not give you permission to be cruel.
It does not excuse hatred.
It does not justify perpetual victimhood.
Life is hard.
The world does not revolve around you.
No one is coming to save you.
If you spend your days being chronically offended, outraged, and miserable — congratulations, that’s exactly what your life will reflect back to you.
But if you accept that change is possible — and do the work — your life can look radically different.
More peace.
More love.
More laughter.
More fulfillment.
Final Truth (Sorry, Not Sorry)
So yeah — sorry not sorry to blow up your fantasy today.
The truth isn’t gentle.
It isn’t comfortable.
But it will set you free — if you’re brave enough to face it.
And if this made you mad?
Good. That’s usually where growth starts.
Stick Around.
If this made you uncomfortable, good — you’re probably in the right place.
I write about wellness, faith, food, healing, and hard truths without watering them down. No trend-chasing. No victim narratives. No performative healing. Just real life, real food, and real responsibility — rooted in faith and lived experience.
If you want:
Nourishing recipes made with whole, real ingredients
Wellness that actually works in real life
Faith without fluff
Truth without sugarcoating
Then you can subscribe below.
It’s free. It’s honest. And it’s for people who are ready to grow.
🖤🐝